So many of us have varied relationships with food. Some of us truly enjoy eating and enjoying gastronomic creations from the many events and restaurants that are visited. Some of us enjoy food when it is played with whether on plates or the many food fights we can remember. There are also those that enjoy the eroticism of food not just by eating it to enjoy the orgasmic qualities but also to indulge in sexual fantasies utilizing food objects as conductors for sexual play. Come on, you know what I'm talking about. So which are you? And why do you want to know which am I? I'm the chef damn it. I just cook it to make you happy and that's one of the stories that I'm sticking with. I don't know nutin bro. Hee he he he he heee hee, ahhhhhh bwoy...
So food porn, you see it all the time. It's a picture, it's a thought, it's whatever you make it providing it conotates and stimulates a delicious gratification. Sometimes even a sexual component can be extracted. Food Porn - the dish looks so sexy it makes me feel all tingly inside...one delicious bite at a time.
Food Porn - just looking at the warm dark chocolate dripping from that ripe... luscious... strawberry just makes me wet...in the mouth!!!
Food Porn - I took a bite from that golden yummylicious peach and the juice just oooozed, running all down my fingers down the side of my lips...heavenly.
Food Porn - ...he decides that the next shrimp I eat he should feed it to me..He says close your eyes and open wide..I comply!! I sit there, my lips are quivering as I wait, wait to devour that shrimp only I feel a hard warm sensory feeling glide across my lips. It's his fingers dripped in warm drawn butter...sooo slippery, so smooth! Then I feel what he is feeding me..that succulent shrimp, so meaty, crunchy, spicy, tasty, juices hitting the back and sides of my mouth as I take each bite..simply orgasmic..It IS Food Porn!!
But what if food had human like personalities and truly enjoyed being with other ingredients, what would their conversations be like. I wonder now...ummm.
Ok, you still reading? Just checking :-) Now here's a flipped script. Imagine what foods paired with each other would say to each other given that they are.. well, you know, so close to each other..touching each other, looking at each other, laying on top of each other..Yes, what would they say to each other..These two are the ones invited to this party. Smooth velvety hot chocolate topped off with fresh whipped cream and silky chocolate curls and sprinkles paired with a chocolate Biscotti ready to be sipped, nibbled and munched. You sure that's all you see?..Really? If you can't picture it, let me do it for ya.Well let's see then....
"...psssst psssst..yeah you, what took you so long? Do you know why they put us here together? Why of course,we're a perfect pair, You with sexy curves, mounds and sweet creamy taste and me..well I'm just the glutenous maximus twice baked hard and crunchy. I'm now feeling a little amorous looking at those steamy puffs. Well you know I've been looking to have my foamy cream spreaded, poked and prodded. I feel so full, I'm so ready to burst. Hmmmm, long strong and hard I see and the color of chocolate to boot..ssssst, oooooooh!!! You need to come closer friend, feel my smooth lines and delectable curves. Da hell you say, you know you ain't got to tell me twice boo. Do you know I was hoping to come and snuggle right next to you too?. Sitting over here with your pillowy mounds looking oooooh so sexy. I have a good mind to just..to just..just..oh hell, I just want to dip my pointy head in all that yummy goodness...Well you know I'm not gona be around for long. What you waiting for? Come find your hot wet chocolate surprise while I'm still steamy Mr crunchy.. Oh my, you said that right on time for I'm just getting a lift and it's pointing in your direction. Sooo inviting, sooo exciting. OMG, I'm going IIINNN...ahhhhhhhhhhhhh...ooooooooo!!!!
Oohhhhhh, stir me monsieur biscotti, stir me till I lose control. Damn, now I'm gona be sipped and slurped in a second here..can you feel me melting all around you? I loved how you just parted my fluffy mounds...so strong, so assertive, so hard..orgasmically erotic....Wait, wait you can't leave so soon... No my love, I'm just backing out to come back in again for more..Dip - dip - dip..It's so devine, sooo delicious. Such a pitty it can't last forever. I can now feel my crumbles all over you..Yep, we both seemed to have lost our heads in all this excitement..But I totally enjoyed it all. Bye boooooooooooo-------------------- crunch, crunch, crunch..sip, sip, sip.
I don't know, that basket of grapes, banana, strawberries and chocolate looks quite interesting. Ummm, part 2 perhaps?
Yep, FOOD PORN indeed!!!!
So food porn, you see it all the time. It's a picture, it's a thought, it's whatever you make it providing it conotates and stimulates a delicious gratification. Sometimes even a sexual component can be extracted. Food Porn - the dish looks so sexy it makes me feel all tingly inside...one delicious bite at a time.
Food Porn - just looking at the warm dark chocolate dripping from that ripe... luscious... strawberry just makes me wet...in the mouth!!!
Food Porn - I took a bite from that golden yummylicious peach and the juice just oooozed, running all down my fingers down the side of my lips...heavenly.
Food Porn - ...he decides that the next shrimp I eat he should feed it to me..He says close your eyes and open wide..I comply!! I sit there, my lips are quivering as I wait, wait to devour that shrimp only I feel a hard warm sensory feeling glide across my lips. It's his fingers dripped in warm drawn butter...sooo slippery, so smooth! Then I feel what he is feeding me..that succulent shrimp, so meaty, crunchy, spicy, tasty, juices hitting the back and sides of my mouth as I take each bite..simply orgasmic..It IS Food Porn!!
But what if food had human like personalities and truly enjoyed being with other ingredients, what would their conversations be like. I wonder now...ummm.
"...psssst psssst..yeah you, what took you so long? Do you know why they put us here together? Why of course,we're a perfect pair, You with sexy curves, mounds and sweet creamy taste and me..well I'm just the glutenous maximus twice baked hard and crunchy. I'm now feeling a little amorous looking at those steamy puffs. Well you know I've been looking to have my foamy cream spreaded, poked and prodded. I feel so full, I'm so ready to burst. Hmmmm, long strong and hard I see and the color of chocolate to boot..ssssst, oooooooh!!! You need to come closer friend, feel my smooth lines and delectable curves. Da hell you say, you know you ain't got to tell me twice boo. Do you know I was hoping to come and snuggle right next to you too?. Sitting over here with your pillowy mounds looking oooooh so sexy. I have a good mind to just..to just..just..oh hell, I just want to dip my pointy head in all that yummy goodness...Well you know I'm not gona be around for long. What you waiting for? Come find your hot wet chocolate surprise while I'm still steamy Mr crunchy.. Oh my, you said that right on time for I'm just getting a lift and it's pointing in your direction. Sooo inviting, sooo exciting. OMG, I'm going IIINNN...ahhhhhhhhhhhhh...ooooooooo!!!!
Oohhhhhh, stir me monsieur biscotti, stir me till I lose control. Damn, now I'm gona be sipped and slurped in a second here..can you feel me melting all around you? I loved how you just parted my fluffy mounds...so strong, so assertive, so hard..orgasmically erotic....Wait, wait you can't leave so soon... No my love, I'm just backing out to come back in again for more..Dip - dip - dip..It's so devine, sooo delicious. Such a pitty it can't last forever. I can now feel my crumbles all over you..Yep, we both seemed to have lost our heads in all this excitement..But I totally enjoyed it all. Bye boooooooooooo-------------------- crunch, crunch, crunch..sip, sip, sip.
I don't know, that basket of grapes, banana, strawberries and chocolate looks quite interesting. Ummm, part 2 perhaps?
Yep, FOOD PORN indeed!!!!
Chef! waah yuh need some??lol
ReplyDeleteChef, folks call my dishes food porn all of the time. Something about food is truly erotic, but only for the romantics. Otherwise, it's a meal to be enjoyed with the company that was chosen. Personally, I savor every bite. Sometimes it transports me to a moment...a time...an instance and sometimes I'm simply getting my eat on! I guess that it would depend on what you're eating, where you're eating and who you're eating...with! :)
ReplyDeleteNice blog Chef. Hmmmmm, I wonder how many folks are afraid to respond! lol
At the begining I thought it was a typo- silly me. I like your spin on it. Surely won't look at food the same. I'm sure you got some juices flowing.
ReplyDelete@Marty, thanks for the props and for stopping in to catch a read. I just want to make sure everyone enjoys the meal of choice regardless of what it is
ReplyDelete@janice typo, not at all :-) glad you enjoyed reading the post. tThanls for the follow. Share if you can with your friends, I hope they follow too. Stay tuned, more to come..
@Latoya Some people bwoy!!! :-) you lnow it's all about the ideas behind the food :-)
Thanks, this post just inspired me to make a really steamy Valentines dinner!
ReplyDeleteThe wonderful thing about food is that you can make it anything you want it to be depending on the mood you're in.
ReplyDeleteErotic ... yes most definitely, highly influenced and impacted by the company you're with :)
Comforting, like an old friend welcoming you home... it can be that too.
Educational... as in " hey you there, think about me while you eat me!... I'm an eel, maybe you never thought you'd ever eat me, and now, since you've taken another bite, I guess you like me"
You should hear the conversations the ingredients my knife comes into contact with have with each other and the knife,the pot, and the burner; when i decide to cook to cool off from an argument, or to think my decisions through without making myself crazy about whether it was a write choice or a wrong choice :)
Anyway.. enough from me about that.
This particular post is a really inventive and interesting peek into the creative mind of a chef... Thanks for it.
I wait with baited breath for instillation # 2. and in the mean time, I'll go write my blog post for today. Check it out when you have the time, http://alisonwestja.blogspot.com/